MuZZ

So as the last post states.





I started some medication. They call it Zoloft, and I not so affectionatly call it "that shit".

I have to say though, I feel slower? a little calmer? I guess.

My noisy, constantly moving mind seems to have slowed some, I havent seen or heard as much weird shit, and I cannot, despite some wanting too, (you know, willfully sulking about shit) keep on the downer train as easily - but it's been three days, and I havent been to work yet while on this stuff. That I find will be more of a trial. I find my anxiety and bad times happen the most at work, and when I am home alone.

I reach out, when I can. I speak to a few close people, you know who you are, if you're reading this.

I logged off of facebook this weekend also. Some distance from the constant stream of bullshit, constant need to filter myself, for example, may be a boon. Not to mention it is one of the first and last things I see throughout my day, instead of reading more wholesome things. Maybe a week away will be useful, and if needed, longer.

I go back to work on tuesday, and with some reservation. I do not like my current work, but do it to ensure we stay afloat. Retail work is never "ideal" but employment, for now, is employment.


Hopefully work will not be awkward, only as much as I make it.